Matthew's Journal

I reckon that anyone who hears anything I say could repeat it to anyone; and that if I don't want Bob to know about what I said that I should only say it where people-who-won't-tell-Bob might hear.

I think I'd think that anyone who told Bob was more Bob's friend that my friend (especially if what I'd said was "Bob is scum"); but I reckon I have to determine that about people prior to saying things and failure to do so is my fault.

If I heard you telling Alice that you thought that Bob was a horrible person who you never want to talk to again and I later was talking to Bob and discovered that Bob thought that you thought that he was a great friend of yours and I happened to like Bob, or at least think that Bob should not be allowed to go on believing lies that might hurt him then... yes, I might well tell Bob that that's not really the case.

I think that the case where I tell Charlie that you said that Bob (etc) is less clear because telling *Bob* might actually be doing Bob a favour (and I like Bob) but telling *Charlie* is probably just spreading gossip about.

Although if Charlie was planning a dinner party and about to invite you and Bob I might say "oh, I thought Matthew didn't like Bob"; quite possibly having forgotten why I thought that.

There is always the problem that if you say to Alice "Bob is a trainspotter" then I might later say to Charlie "oh, I heard Bob is a trainspotter" if Bob's hobbies and/or trainspotting came up in my conversation with Charlie - and I might not even remember how I came by this information.